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Wednesday, March 31

Tuesday Tacit

Yes, well, perhaps you have something edifying to say - but I sure as hell don't.....so here's a new tune instead ::


....actually - while we're on the topic of forever holding one's peace + and before my naproxen kicks in - here's a list of people from whom I would be very glad not to hear another word ::

:: Hilary Snuff - I'd beat my child if I ever.....
:: Tim Russert - Let's kill him and give Judy Woodruff the position of TV's Offical Expert.
:: Certain Gay Mafia Bloggers - yeah, I'm well aware of the fact I don't have to read you - but just knowing that you're there is...irritating.
:: Courtney Love - Ok, I am, without a doubt, a huge fan - of her singing, that is.
:: Dizzy Rascal - Don't believe the hype - especially if it's from the UK.
:: Sundry Backstabbers - Some people in my life have seen fit to talk trash about me. Hey, guess what - you no longer exist.

Cameo Word Up.

Monday, March 29

Long Day, Short Remix

From a song I wrote a while ago - and can't seem to leave alone ::

Oh So Stush (Libra Supreme mix).mp3

Long Weekend, Short Version

Themes ::

:: Loyalty
:: Electricity
:: Reputations
:: People Who Need People/It Sucks To Be You/Punk Rock Girl
:: Martini's Can Ruin Your Life - If Not Your Look.

Outcomes ::

:: Hungover
:: A Flood In My House (no shit...)
:: Social Turbulence
:: Loss Of Emotional Virginity (not you, stupid...)
:: Tired.

[for librans only :: no, you're not crazy - that hate you feel is actually love...I think]

Wednesday, March 24

But Before I Go

Here's a remix - for the weekend, of course - of a song I wrote a few months back ::

RiseAndShine (We Need More Blow mix).mp3

[Be bad.]

Issue Forth

"Having Issues" used to be a state of affairs where, due to your evident weirdness, no-one would talk to you at cocktail parties...unless, of course, you were Woody Allen...in which case, you'd make a film about the psychiatric plat de jour after having asked all your friends to work for free. These days, however, even the emotionally antiseptic seem to brim with issues (for some reason, Leeza Gibbons & Mary Cheney come to mind), and, in an amazing example of psychobabble en masse - everyone's talking about 'having issues' all - the - time*.

*This is a Big Deal for me, of course, as it stands in direct contravention to my/every Jewish mother's edict that -
"If you don't have anything nice to say, just don't s- "
[sorry...just can't complete that phrase in public....hey, there ya go - an issue]

So I thought I'd parse/share/explore/resolve a few choice Right Now Issues, right here, on this, my web page - which I'd also like to assert, at this very moment, as being my own Personal Safe Space.... Ah, such a lovely cadence to that phrase.... Anyways, please read with and not against me. Word. Work. Trust. Peacock - whatever...

#1 Not Having Had Closure :: Aside from conveying a highly specific meaning among Plastic Surgery Disaster Specialists, missing out on closure seems to be the awkward love child of Not Getting Over It & chronic whining. I'm still not certain what, exactly, is meant by 'closure'...but, yikes - what a stupid word. According to my mother, a lack of closure is inversely proportional to the potency of the pre-nup.

#2 Fear Of Happiness :: What you say when you want the yellow prozac.

#3 Fear Of Abandonment :: This one is interesting in that it is both an "issue" as well as self-fulfilling prophesy among those who admit it's presence in their psyche. People afflicted as such make dreadful dates.

#4 Bad At Math :: Common among the over-degree'd & under-paid. Some also use this to explain an utter lack of social skills which, of course, makes no sense now, does it.....

#5 Lost :: Without map. Hee hee - kidding. This just means you're kinda fucked up & kinda in love with yourself.

#6 Self-Hating :: Funny - but this issue only ever seems to originate among 3rd party participants - in other words, I judge you as self-hating - but you never describe yourself as self-hating. I think it just implies "Hating" ...nevermind - it's a gay thing.

#7 Not Feeling Authentic :: Well, I guess this could become a hefty buzz-killer if you were, say, a spy or a drag queen - but other than that, I've only ever witnessed this among the Followers Of Oprah.

#8 Feeling Fat :: This is all about transference; specifically, the transference of all that saturated fat from those ruffles you binged on last night, to your ass, which now looks fat today. See - it's not so hard when you break it down...

It's All Good - well, some of the time....

Monday, March 22

Hidden Meanings

A new tune - you figure it out ::

Something's On Your Face.mp3

[rise above or fake it - our only choices, as I see it...]

Friday, March 19


It's Friday - I'm sick - at home - have no money. Fuck all sentient beings.

Anyways, here's a remix of the song I posted Wednesday ::

Koolaid (Less Is More mix).mp3

And so on.

Wednesday, March 17

Yeah - There's Snow Outside....

A new song, written while trapped in my house today ::


I need candy.

Tuesday, March 16

Deep Thoughts

To live in hearts we leave behind
Is not to die

- Thomas Campbell [1822]

Monday, March 15

The Plan (as executed)


:: Obtain supplies. Ogle supplier's splendid new digs, furnishings courtesy Caban. Note bitterly to myself that I have, for all intents & purposes, paid for several of the faux Courbusier chairs therein.
:: Omar, Colin & Shelley. And Faiza. And Danny at his workplace. Food looked great, but we just kinda pushed it around on our plates. You know - eating in public and all that...
:: Dimitri with Bianca and said Nightlife Luminaries. Posh str8 friendly crowd. Elegant House, if that makes any sense. Lost a whole whack of cash - gay jeans with micro-pockets - go figure.
:: To the "Spa", for a different kinda of facial. German guy - built like a powerlifter, manners of an archduke. Quite weird.


:: No shopping, since I lost funds the night before.
:: Fly. Ok - considering the DJ was from Miami. Bianca, with her unsurpassed discretion, barfed behind curtain in the so-called H20 lounge.
:: Given that I was going on approx. 2 hours sleep for the last, oh, 3 days, my sudden urge towards unconciousness at O's, despite the presence of a bevy of guests, was not surprising - just rude, that's all. Sorry...


:: As if...so I went home - just in time for the Ides of March...

...which is today.

Friday, March 12

The Plan ::

I'm highly organized in my way ::


:: Obtain supplies.
:: Omar, Colin, Shelly.
:: Dimitri with Bianca and said Nightlife Luminaries.
:: Thrill chill...Peter, hello?


:: Wardrobe enhancement within a wholesale context. Focus - shoes, shirts....
:: Fly. Yes - I know - but I haven't been in almost 3 months.
:: Whatever happens, happens.


:: Jamal - wherever the hell he spins these days. The original orphan-as-DJ.
:: Saunter/stumble about.
:: Determine, via a flurry of panicky phone-calls, what exactly I did the night before.

Perhaps, if you happen to be in Toronto this weekend, I'll end up running over into you.

Wednesday, March 10

Weedless Wednesday

Legality isn't always a good thing....so - since I've nothing to do except wait for the man today - because dealers now consider themselves part of the Better Business Community - which means you get to wait - even longer - I wrote a remix of a song I wrote last year ::

Give (lil-bit-o-joy mix).mp3

Tuesday, March 9

Timely Repost :: It Sucks To Be Martha

I've never really gotten into serious Martha bashing. She just doesn't bug me. I rather like the Doris Day/Adolf Hitler duality of her public persona, where she initially appears to give a fuck, but, soon thereafter, reveals that she doesn't. Like when she used - on one TV segment - shredded Christian Dior pantyhose to tie tomato stakes together. Like when she tries to exterminate uncouth neighbours with her Chevy Suburban. Like when she defies Congress.

This, however, is kinda funny .....

No, YOUR bunk has the GLAZED chintz comforter, MINE has the sheets from Frette...

It came with some fun recipes;

Cell Block Salad
Serves Cell Block 28
Hundred pounds of hacked, but unwashed cucumbers
hundred fifty pounds of sliced but unwashed onions and some tomato juice if available
Shovel in a lot of salt and potato peelings

Serve before the end of the month

Chicken Al La Lesbo
Serves 69
leftover spaghetti
any sauce
chicken soup and any chicken scraps collected in the butcher shop
a lot of spoiled milk and puddings and any vegetables like peas which you can find

Cook it for a while until it's good and pasty. Serve in a well ventilated room

[from this guy's site....]

A shy girl, Dean had apparently never heard of waxing

Monday, March 8

Let's Just Pretend It Isn't Monday - Ok?

Here's a weekend-oriented remix of the tune I posted yesterday ::

I Am Listening...To Techno (Popper mix).mp3

'Cause, after all these years, I still get excited about those sorts of things...

Sunday, March 7

But What Does This Have To Do With Me?

Everything-you-want-in-a-blogger recently wrote something which gave me a sudden inspiration for this ::

I Am Listening...To Techno.mp3

(In case you're wondering - I'm a tracker/MIDI man - not a drum machine in sight, baby...)

Friday, March 5

:: Blogging Drama Alert ::

Hot Girl on Girl Action!!!

Thursday, March 4

Doing My Part

Here is a song I just wrote; it forms the basis of my new project, tentatively titled, "Music For A Gay Wedding" ::


a) Crank it
b) May be illegal in some regions of the US
c) A Divorce Album will follow

Wednesday, March 3

It's Not Just A Job, It's A Queer Career

Being gay, that is....and I think it's especially important to remember this now that we're getting all this grown-up attention. ...we're under surveillance - and no, this isn't a fetish scene, so you can put the webcam away, for cryin' out loud...Anyways Ladies - below are some of our shared duties, as I see them ::

:: To ensure the preservation our cherished perversity (think of the following tableau as your enemy...golden lab, a minivan, bourgeois ennui...I know - horrible or what?)
:: To pass on helpful tips to our newer members (e.g., pinch the end of your dick if the e makes pissing feel impossible...never ever use butter-flavoured Crisco...hum when you rim)
:: To liven up whatever social occaision one may have ambushed - 'cuz one is so innately funny (it's a stereotype which, if fulfilled, can produce handsome rewards)
:: To remain alive, and help those who are struggling to do so (idea :: Gay Peace Corps - "The Gay Brigade"(?) - goes to the Saharan Sub-Continent and does, well, something to help with the AIDS/HIV m-e-g-a-d-e-m-i-c there. Shocking that we never talk about this...)
:: To continue our trailblazing efforts in increasing both the quantity and quality of porn everywhere (who knew str8 gals would love Ken Ryker so much? just wait 'til they lay their eyes on Talvin)
:: To continue our trailblazing efforts in increasing Cable TV revenues (Q.A.F.2 :: The Wank To The Bank)
:: To enshrine the idea that we, as a group, have too much disposable income and are, at this very moment, also having way more fun, somewhere else (we lose this - and we lose Miyake forever)

Be all you can be...(this weekend, at least.)

Tuesday, March 2

And A Bag of Chips...

A remix of Vincent's birthday song,::

HappyHappyHappy (FlakyFunky mix).mp3

A selection of e-mail outtakes with La Jennie...posting it forward, as it were ::

is it same sex if I marry you?

do we have to have a pug?

is god a bottom?

yes, to all your questions...

the 26 year old mayor of new paltz?! a member of the green party, as well! i'd same sex marry him! in a hot gay minute.

ok, no pugs.

you know, i'm all over the place about this one, frankly, my radical ambivalence, maybe it was going to a funeral twice a week back in the early 90's, whatever it is. also? the economist has a really good editorial this week on all of this, the capitalists (radical liberals, heh) have spoken... and i'm all about them right now.

everyone now hates bush, which is even better.

no one likes marriage, i hope. but that's just me.

if a gauntlet is thrown, it better be pashmina. i don't care how 2 years ago that is either. so there.

Yeah, really....what's to hate?

Monday, March 1

It's Monday & I'm Menstrual

Click the pic - and hear my plea....

[...hey - I'm serious...]