Memo :: Letting Loose With Amendments
To :: The Powers That Be, US of A
Re :: The Dyslexic Commander-in-Chief Problem
Here's an idea - while you're devoting yourselves to re-writing your constitution (boy - that was one HELLUVA mandate, eh?), why not slip another new amendment in - there, right behind that Pentagon line item budget proposal for an anti Arab ray gun - which precludes reactionary morons from holding public office? I mean, you wouldn't ever want to have some Ayatollah from Texas or something in charge now....
Monday, February 23
Never Being Boring
This was Friday evening - a send off for our friend Richard (hunk in pink), who is leaving us to pursue studies at Chapel Hill. Feel the love, Bitch....
I ate so much food this past Saturday night, I more than considered visiting the local hospital for an emergency gastrointestinal c-section. A charity function, a gifted Italian caterer, and far too much free chianti classico do not a happy digestion make. My tablemates were largely comprised of girls named "Angela" and, I swear to god, "Francesca"....[love that name, sounds like a drink...."Hi - I'll have a Francesca, with a twist"]....who, to a gal, were startlingly funny. I can faithfully report that the vibe from the str8 female nation is that a) smart girls get the big screen tv no later than 4 months into the relationship, in preparation for the inevitable break up which is precipitated by the b) affair the BF is bound to have with your cousin's best friend - which, all told, doesn't really matter, 'cuz c) you've been boffing Ange, his best friend, for like 3 months, this entire time.
I'd hang with these ladies anytime, Honey - anytime...
Love is never having to re-invent yourself - everyday.
Friday, February 13
A lot of my friends are presenting as virtually suicidal right now - so what gives? February, Satan's favourite month, is nearly over, there are still roughly two weeks to scam the rent - and Holt's is having a sale (!) for crying out loud....
What's causing my blood pressure to approach vitality, this year, so far ::
:: Hot, New Cuisines :: well, not new to, let's say, the Kurdish Tribesmen who've been feasting on guinea-pig-on-a-spit for, like, thousands of years - but new enough for a comestible dilettante like me, who's totally fucking had it with Kimchi, Gravlax & Food That's Still Alive On Your Plate.
:: Gay Divorce Rituals :: The mind positively boggles...
:: My Friends' Gay Divorce Rituals :: Ditto, squared.
:: Post-Emo Boys :: Everything you'd want in a trick - and less.
:: Blogging From One's Cell Phone :: Now listen - this is a lot closer than you might think. The acronym "IRL" could/would be replaced with "BLIRL" - or "TWIRL", for that matter...provided, of course, that you were on the right kind of drugs.
:: The Complicated Life :: A new reality show based on the adventures of Lurlene & Shania, 2 interbred hicks from Belleville, Ont. with conspicuously absent teeth and no fashion sense to speak of, who are left to fend for themselves on New York's Upper East Side. They'll be staying in Ivanka Trump's Co-op on 5th Ave., given Bendel's charge cards, and a list of charity events to chair. With special guest appearances by Jayne Wrightsman, Bianca Jagger, Princess Stephanie & P.Diddy. Maybe Martha, if she is able to obtain a day pass. The season will climax with an incredible 3-way smackdown involving these two untouchables & Cornelia Guest (this concept virtually shops itself, doesn't it...).
:: Courtney Love :: Yes, but have you actually heard her new album? Ok - so shut up.
[Actually, I've been thinking recently about Jackie O. Like - what her daily routine must have been like + what dry cleaner she favoured (she, uh, would know.....brain stains, hello...) + how she ever raised Donnie without a man around the house. Maybe that's why he's always stealing sunglasses]
Friday, February 6
Places To Go - People To Do
OtherLove recently suggested I write him a piece of music entitled Tragic Mulatto. Did you know I live to serve? ::
Large Synaptic Gaps notwithstanding, I'm pretty sure I had a great weekend. Things got off to a great, vodka-drenched start with The Beauticious Brodie who's even more disarmingly charming in the flesh and has, as you can see, eyebrows for days. Then we spiralled into an abyss of V. Calderone, Brilla's, Jamal, this other party, Venus, a lot of wandering around & bumping around, blah blah blah. Fully hilarious - if you know what I mean.
Here are random pics ::
[Wish I hadn't missed the Justin Hertitwasfake incident, though. 'Cuz reality rocks....]